


Peppermint and Gold

by GinnyK



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Drama, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2002-11-20
Updated: 2002-11-20
Packaged: 2019-05-31 03:23:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,983
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15110789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GinnyK/pseuds/GinnyK
Summary: Josh and Donna spend some quality time together over Christmas.





	Peppermint and Gold

**Author's Note:**

> A copy of this work was once archived at National Library, a part of the [ West Wing Fanfiction Central](https://fanlore.org/wiki/West_Wing_Fanfiction_Central), a West Wing fanfiction archive. More information about the Open Doors approved archive move can be found in the [announcement post](http://archiveofourown.org/admin_posts/8325).

**Peppermint and Gold**

**by: Ginny**

**Pairing(s):** Josh/Donna  
**Rating:** YTEEN  
**Disclaimer:** The usual, not mine etc.  
**Summary:** Josh and Donna spend some quality time together over Christmas. Sequel to "Everything Will Be OK".  
**Feedback:** Always welcome.  


The POV is Donna's 

After watching the Christmas parade without too many problems Josh convinced me that he was fit to drive so I let him take me back to the White House to pick up my car. He seemed to be doing better. He decided to go in to see if the President was around. Josh was not too happy to hear the President called his apartment last night. And that I forgot to tell him until this morning. Well, I had a lot on my mind last night and this morning. I'm sure the President didn't expect Josh to call him on Christmas morning anyway. I spent the day with friends and am now lounging in the tub thinking about the events of the last month. Josh just called and he's coming over in a little while with something for dinner. I think any lingering confusion I had about last night has gone away. I have come to the conclusion that Josh just really needed a friend. If that's all there is to it at this moment that's fine with me. Josh really is my best friend and I don't want anything to ruin that. I glance at the clock, 7:00. Half an hour til Josh said he would be over. I drag myself out of the bubbles and throw on jeans and a sweater. I put my hair up in a pony tail and debate whether or not to put some make-up on. I decide against it. I plug in the lights to the Christmas tree and light some candles. Normally I would put on a Christmas CD, but I don't think that's a good idea right now. 

The doorbell rings at exactly 7:30. I don't think Josh has ever been so punctual. I open the door and see he is actually smiling. He's carrying a bag full of chinese take out and a smaller paper bag. 

"Merry Christmas, Donna" as he leans over and gives me a completely innocent kiss on the cheek. 

"Thank you" 

I take the food from him and put it on the kitchen table. Josh stays in the living room and takes off his coat. I stand in the doorway and look at him for a moment. He looks ten times better than he did last night. He's wearing khaki pants and a denim shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, as usual. He sits on the couch and puts the other bag on the coffee table. I come out of the kitchen and join him. 

"So, did you see the President this afternoon" 

"Actually I did, he had just come down to the Oval Office to check on something when I got there" 

"And?" 

"And we had a nice conversation. You were right. He did understand. Not to say that he wasn't pissed at me for yelling at him in the middle of the Oval Office. But he was really nice about the whole thing. I think Leo talked to him. He told me he is glad that I am going to get some help and that if I ever needed anything to let him know. He also said he was glad you were with me last night. Did I thank you enough for what you did last night?" 

"Yes, Joshua, you did." 

"Just making sure. Let's eat before the food gets cold" 

We sit down at the kitchen table and he dishes out the food. We make small talk during the meal, nothing important. We gossip about Sam and Mallory and Danny and CJ. When we're done I hand him a fortune cookie. 

"Read it" 

"You don't need to look far for the things that are important to you" 

He smiles at me and I am sure I am turning 5 shades of red. 

"My turn" I break the cookie in half. 

"You always know just what to do" 

"That's for sure" 

Josh squeezes my hand. I'm sure I'm blushing again. I jump up to put the dishes in the sink. Is it getting warm in here or is it just me? Josh wanders into the living room and turns on the TV to get the football scores. I watch him from the kitchen while I wash the dishes. He's stretched out on the couch with his shoes off. He certainly looks more like himself tonight. The twinkle in his eyes is still missing but I have seen his dimples more than once since he got here. I finish up the few dishes and go into the living room. He curls his feet up to give me room and I sit next to him on the couch. 

"Anything good on?" 

"No" as he turns off the TV. He sits up, faces me and grabs the bag off of the coffee table. 

"I didn't get a chance to get you a real Christmas present. I was too busy trying to keep from falling apart these past few weeks, not that I succeeded or anything. Anyway, I wanted to get you something but there weren't any good stores open on Christmas Day so I had to shop at 7-11. This is the best I could do there, but I promise I will make it up to you." 

He hands me the package. I really can't imagine what he bought me from 7-11. I reach into the bag and start to laugh as I pull out a roll of Peppermint Lifesavers. 

"Donna, I know this is corny but words can't express how much of a lifesaver you were to me last night. How much of a lifesaver you are to me all the time. So this is just a very small token of my appreciation. I swear I will get you something better tomorrow." 

I just stare and smile at him until tears come to me eyes. I can't say a word. Josh just pulls me into a big hug and holds me for a minute. 

"I didn't mean to make you cry, it's just a 59 cent pack of candy" 

"Oh, Joshua" 

I put the candy on the table and reach for a tissue. He picks up the roll and starts to open it. 

"What are you doing?" I scream at him 

"Taking a mint, what does it look like?" 

"Don't open them, I'm going to save them" 

He starts to laugh and reaches into his shirt pocket and pulls out another roll. 

"I was pretty sure you would say that so I got two." 

I give him a swat on the arm and he pops a mint into his mouth and then does the same to me. We settle back on the couch, side by side, our bodies barely touching. Neither of us feel the need to talk right now. After what seems like hours, it was actually 10 minutes, Josh finds his voice. 

 

****

 

"Donna, can we talk?" 

"Sure, Josh, about anything in particular?" 

"About last night" 

"What about last night?" 

"I'm not sure how to say this. I was in really bad shape last night and I just want to make sure that I didn't send you the wrong message about anything. I mean, we slept together in my bed." 

"Yeah, we did. But believe me I didn't get wrong idea about anything. Sure we slept in the same bed, but you were upset, sobbing and exhausted. Those things don't make for a particularly romantic evening." 

"True, but I just wanted to make sure that, well, you know what I mean" 

"I do. Look, I'm not going to lie to you and say the thought of us being more than just friends has never crossed my mind. But for now, I love the way things are between us. You are my best friend. I know I can count on you. The harmless flirting we do is great and if we want to hold hands once in a while and maybe even share a kiss that's fine with me. No strings attached. No offense, but I am not interested in finding out if sleeping together would make our relationship any better. I don't want to take the chance that it would ruin everything" 

"Donna, you have once again taken the words right out of my mouth" 

"Josh, you know I love you, right?" 

"Yeah, I do and I love you too" 

We just sit for a while on the couch, watching the twinkling lights on the tree. Josh jumps at the sound of a siren outside. I pull him towards me and he puts his head on my shoulder. He's shaking, I'm not sure if it's the siren or the conversation we just had. We stay like this long after the sound fades down the street. I kiss his forehead and he pulls away. There's a single tear streaming down his cheek and I brush it away with my thumb. 

"Now what, Josh?" 

"How about a walk?" 

"Josh, it's 10:00 at night and 20 degrees outside." 

"So, bundle up and let's go" 

I grab my coats, mittens and hat from the closet while he puts his coat and gloves on. I look out the window and it is snowing. By the looks of it the snow has been falling since Josh came over. There's couple on inches on the ground already. We head out the door and down the front steps. It is beautiful out. We head over to the small park down the street from my apartment. 

"Let's swing" 

"OK" 

We swing in silence for a few minutes. I think I even see the twinkle coming back into Josh's eyes. Either that or he's just really cold. We jump off of the swings and walk around some more. The neighborhood kids must have been out, there's remnants of snow angels on the ground. 

"Look, snow angels" as I lay down on the snow to make my own. "Come on Josh, your turn" 

"No, I think I'll pass" 

"OK, then you can help me up" 

He reaches out to help me up with his good hand. He pulls me up and doesn't let go of my hand. The snow has stopped and the wind is picking up so we head back, still hand in hand. 

"How about some hot chocolate?" 

"Sure, then I think I should be going, we do have to go to work in the morning." 

I put the milk on the stove and get some cookies out of the cabinet. Josh has once again kicked his shoes off and is sitting on the floor with his back against the couch, watching football highlights. I put the cookies and the hot chocolate on the end table and lay on the couch behind him. We eat and drink in silence while we watch the TV. I'm still chilly from our walk so I grab the afghan and cover myself up. He leans his head back to look at me and he just smiles. God, I love those dimples. I smooth back his hair that's starting to curl up from being wet with snow. He sighs and puts his head back down to watch the TV. I prop my head up with my left hand and drape my right one over his shoulder. I feel myself start to doze off. 

"Donna, it's midnight" 

Josh is standing next to me putting his coat on. 

"Josh?" 

"I'm going to get going. We both need a good night's sleep. I'll see you in the morning." 

I sit up on the couch and he sits next to me for a minute. 

"Thank you so much, for everything. I don't know how to repay you" 

"Josh, you already have, Getting the help you need is all I ever wanted. I just want you to feel safe and be happy." 

"You make me do both of those things, Donna." 

He kisses me on the forehead and heads out the door. 

I head to the bedroom thinking, this didn't start out to be the Christmas of my dreams but now I'm beginning to think maybe it has been. I smile as I look at the roll of candy in my hand. 

 

****

 

The alarm blares out at me. 5:00 already? I slam down the snooze button and pull the covers over my head again. Nine minutes later the alarm goes off again. Guess it is really time to get up. The sun is out and the streets have been plowed. That's a good sign. I stumble into the shower. By 6:00 I am ready to leave. I can't help but wonder what kind of mood Josh will be in this morning. I hope he got some sleep. 

The drive over to the White House goes quickly, which is a rare occasion when snow blankets the city. Usually things just come to a complete stop. I guess lots of people are on vacation today, but not the White House staff. 

I don't see Josh's car in the parking lot. Not that I really expect him to be early or anything. After a quick stop to get some coffee and muffins for us I am heading to my desk. As soon as I sit down Charlie is standing in front of me. 

"He's not in yet, is the President looking for him?" 

"No one is looking for Josh, this is for you" He puts an envelope in my hand and before I can say anything turns back towards his office. I turn it over, look at it and shudder. The Seal of the President of the United States. Yikes. It has my name on it so it must be for me. I sit and open it with shaking hands. Although I'm not sure why I'm shaking, I mean, I talk to the President all the time. And I don't get nervous, at least not anymore. I take out the card. It's a hand written note. 

Donna, 

I'm sure Josh has thanked you for all you did for him on Christmas Eve. If not, tell him to see me first thing this morning! I just wanted to let you know how much I appreciate all you have done for him these last few months. Your concern for him and for the rest of us has not gone unnoticed. You have gone above and beyond what is expected of you. I am proud of you and I hope this coming year will be a better one for all of us. 

Jed Bartlet 

I read it two more times. I can't believe it. A personal note from the President. This is surely a first for me. I'm still staring at the card when Josh comes in. 

"Love notes from a secret admirer?" 

"Wouldn't you like to know, actually it's a note from the President" 

"Sure it is, bring my schedule in please" 

I follow Josh into his office. He drops his backpack on the chair and hangs up his coat. I put his coffee and muffin on his desk. He sits at his desk and puts his feet up on a stack of folders. 

"Josh, I spent a long time on those, please don't kick them over. And by the way that note really is from the President" 

"Then let me see it" 

"No, it's personal" 

"Personal?" as he lifts one eye brow. 

"Joshua, you're impossible. If you're nice to me maybe I will let you read it later. Here's your schedule. It's pretty light, not many people are working today. Leo wants to have lunch with you." 

"Great, I'm sure he wants to have complete play by play of my meeting with Stanley" 

"I don't think so Josh, he's just worried about you. If that's all I'm going to go back out to my desk. Believe it or not, I do have work to do. Eat your breakfast." 

"Yes, dear" he says with a smirk. 

"Josh, flirting is fine, saying "yes dear" is not" 

"Donna, you're going to have to start writing these rules down for me" 

I stick out my tongue at him and close the door behind me. I call CJ to see if the press has gotten a hold of anything to do with Josh and his meeting with Stanley. She assures me that no one has mentioned it, not even Danny. Josh spends a good portion of the morning in his office on the phone. He must be making his own calls for a change because he hasn't bothered me. I checked on him a while ago and he did eat most of his breakfast. I keep busy with computer work and filing. The rest of the morning passes uneventfully. Margaret calls to confirm Josh's lunch with Leo and we make lunch plans of our own. I glance at the clock and realize he only has twenty minutes before he is scheduled to meet Leo in the mess. I get up to poke my head in his office. He's in his chair facing out the window with his feet on the window sill. 

"Josh, 20 minutes until your lunch with Leo" 

No response. I walk over towards Josh and sit on the desk behind him. He's just staring out the window, a million miles away. I try not to startle him by lightly touching his shoulder. 

"Josh, lunch in 20" 

"He spins around quickly nearly knocking me off the desk. 

"Sorry" He puts his elbows on his desk and rubs his eyes. 

"You OK, need some ibuprofen?" 

"Yeah" 

I reach in his right hand desk drawer and get a couple out of the bottle. I get a bottle of water out of the fridge. By now Josh is standing up and starting out the window at the snow. 

"Take these. Did you get any sleep last night?" 

"Yeah, actually I slept pretty well" 

He swallows the pills and rolls down his sleeves. I straighten his tie for him and grab his suit coat. He slips his arms in. 

"Owwww" 

"What's wrong" 

"Nothing, I just bent my hand the wrong way" 

"Speaking of your hand, are you taking the pills?" 

"Yes, dea... I mean, yes, Donna" 

"Good, why don't you go out and get some fresh air for a minute before you meet Leo. It'll help your head" 

"But it is 25 degrees out there" 

"Last night is was 20 and snowing, you didn't have any problems then" 

"OK, you win" 

He heads down the hall and I go to meet Margaret. 

Margaret is in with Leo when I get to her desk. I sit and wait. I can't help but overhear them talking in Leo's office. 

"Leo, I'm just saying that......" 

"Yes, Margaret, I will be nice to him. I know he's had a rough couple of days" 

"OK" 

"You having lunch with Donna?" 

"Yes, Leo and I will not pump her for information about Josh. You'll have to get your information elsewhere. My lips are sealed" 

"Since when? They weren't sealed the day my divorce papers came." 

"I was worried about you" 

"I know and if I didn't say it then, I'm saying it now, thank you for caring" 

"You're welcome. Leo?" 

"What?" 

"You're going to be late" 

I hear Leo go out through the Oval Office and Margaret comes out to grab her bag. 

"How about a round of "Who Has the Most Annoying Boss?" over lunch?" 

"Nah, then we'd have to invite Carol, Bonnie and Ginger." 

"So is Leo going to go easy on Josh at lunch?" 

"I warned him, he better" 

Lunch with Margaret is always a treat. It's something we love to do although our schedules and the schedules of the bosses we adore don't allow us to have lunch alone very often. I tell her about the weekend with Josh without going into great detail. I do tell her about the Lifesavers. Upon hearing that she grants me the "Corniest Boss" award. But she knows how much the thought meant to me. The hour passes quickly and we both need to get back to work. Josh isn't back yet when I return to my desk. I didn't really expect him to be. Sam and Toby stop by during their lunch time wandering of the halls. They both ask how Josh is doing and I just tell them better. Which I guess really he is. He still has that haunted look about him, which a stranger wouldn't notice but I can see a mile away. Speaking of that look, Josh is coming down the hall and things are not looking good. 

****

 

He brushes past my desk and goes into his office, slamming the door behind him. I am contemplating my next move, follow him or stay right here, when the phone rings. 

"Joshua Lyman's office. Hi, Leo." 

"Is he back yet?" 

"Yeah, Hurricane Josh just stormed in 10 seconds ago. Care to clue me in on what happened?" 

"Somehow the press got a hold of the fact that Josh met with someone from ATVA. You can imagine his reaction." 

"Oh, God. How much more can he take right now?" 

"Good question. Look, can you talk to him? I tried and I didn't get anywhere. How's his schedule looking for this afternoon?" 

"I'll talk to him. He doesn't have too much planned, just a few phone calls and an IMF meeting." 

"Cancel the meeting, I will send somebody else. Hold on a second" 

I glance through the blinds at Josh, he's on the couch staring at the ceiling. 

"Donna, the President wants to meet with Josh. Call Mrs. Landingham after he's calmed down to set something up. Don't rush him. The President understands. By the way he didn't eat much at lunch" 

"Great, I'll see what I can do. Bye" 

I hang up the phone and peek through the blinds again. Josh hasn't moved from the couch. I quietly enter the office, closing the door and the blinds. He's curled up with his back towards me. I push him over a little so I have a couple of inches to sit on. I lean over him and prop my left elbow on the back of the couch and gently rub his back with my right hand. He barely moves. 

"Josh?, Leo just called. He told me what happened. Want to talk?" 

"Not particularly" 

"OK, I'm not going to force you to talk. The President wants to meet with you and I assume Leo sometime this afternoon. There is no rush. Tell you what, I will hang out the DO NOT DISTURB sign for an hour. I'll try and set up your meeting with the President for 4:00. It's only 2 now. Stay here and rest for a while. Do you need anything?" 

"Water and can you turn out the lights?" 

"Sure." I put the water on the table next to him and cover him up with his overcoat. I turn out the lights and go back to my desk. I call Mrs. Landingham to set up the meeting. Four is fine with the President. She asks if Josh is OK and I tell her the truth, no he's not. She promises to send Charlie over with some cookies. I call Margaret and let her know the plans so she can tell Leo. I open the door a crack and check on Josh, he seems to be asleep. For the next hour I manage to field phone calls from various members of the press. Danny hasn't called and that is a surprise. I start typing some memos for Josh when suddenly Danny appears in front of me. 

"I figured it wouldn't take you long to wander over here" 

"Donna, I'm not here to give you or Josh a hard time. I had lunch with CJ and she suggested that I talk to you about scheduling some time with Josh for later tonight or first thing in the morning. I want an exclusive and you're my only hope of getting it" 

"You got that right, have a seat. Want some coffee?" 

"Sure" 

I get two cups of coffee and bring them back to my desk. 

"I'll convince Josh to talk to you under a few conditions" 

"What are you his gatekeeper?" 

"That would be a good way of putting it. OK, here's the deal. He's been through so much the last 6 months I don't want to see him get hurt any more than he already has been. You interview him and him only, no talking to the rest of the staff about him, except the President, of course" 

"Of course. What else" 

"You don't mention his sister." 

"Fine" 

"You let him read it first" 

"Donna" 

"I'm the only one who can convince him to do this." 

"Actually the President can pretty much order him to do anything." 

"OK, I'm the only one who can get him to cooperate willingly" 

"I'll grant you that much, anything else" 

"No, I think that's it. I'll call you and set up a time" 

"You run a tight ship Miss Moss, thanks for the coffee." 

I glance at the clock, unfortunately, Josh's hour of peace and quiet is over. 

****

 

Josh is still asleep when I enter the office. I open the blinds to the outside a little to let in the sun. I look in the fridge to try and find something for him to eat. Beer, water and something that probably used to be fruit of some kind. Yuck! I go back out to my desk and grab the apple I brought back from lunch and a cookie Mrs. L sent over. I kneel down next to the couch and smooth back Josh's hair. 

"Josh, it's a little after 3. You have some phone calls to make before your meeting in the Oval Office" 

"Go away" 

I can tell this won't be easy. Time for plan B. 

"Josh, it's 25 out and windy, do you want me to open the windows?" 

"No, I'll get up" 

He reluctantly sits up. 

"Have I ever told you how mean you are, Donna?" 

"Yes, Josh, as a matter of fact you have, many times. Here eat something" 

"I already ate at lunch" 

I shoot him the "don't lie to me" look. 

"Leo has a big mouth. Where's my schedule." 

"It's on your desk, you have a few phone calls to return. I left a list. Yell if you need anything. Oh, I need a few minutes to talk to you before you head over to the Oval Office" 

"OK, Donna?" 

"Yes, Joshua" 

"Thanks" 

I smile and leave him alone to eat and make the phone calls. I want to warn him about my meeting with Danny before he sees the President. 

Twenty minutes later the door opens and Josh emerges. Looking only slightly better. 

"Josh, why don't you run to the men's room and splash some cold water on your face. Try to look a little more alive." 

He does and comes back a few minutes later looking a little more pulled together. 

"What did you need to talk to me about?" 

I push him back into his office and close the door. He sits on the edge of the desk and motions for me to do the same. 

"This can't be good, what's up?" 

"Josh, I'm just going to say this quickly so I would appreciate it if you didn't interrupt" 

"OK. Why do I have the feeling I am not going to like this" 

"Danny came by to see you when you were asleep. I wouldn't let him in. He wants to do an exclusive." He tries to say something but I stop him. "I think you should do it. I already set the rules, no mentioning Joanie, no interviewing the rest of the staff about you, except the President and you get to read it first. Danny agreed. So what do you think?" 

"Actually, I hate the idea, but I know I have to do it. Thanks for running interference for me. Set something up for first thing in the morning. I don't care what runs about me today. I'll tell my side tomorrow." 

"Good. Now go or you're going to be late" 

"I don't know how long I'll be, will you wait for me? Also I am expecting a package, just sign for it, don't peek" 

"No problem, so what's in the package" 

"You'll see later" 

And with that he takes off for the Oval Office. I sit at my desk and wait, not so patiently for the package. I really want to know what's in it. 

A messenger appears at my desk a few minutes before 5. I sign for the package. The messenger refused to tell me where it was from. It's an unmarked padded envelope with a box inside. I shake it, nothing happens. Guess I'll just put it on Josh's desk. I go to set it down on the desk when something catches my eye. It's a large note in Josh's handwriting. 

DONNA, PUT THE PACKAGE DOWN NOW AND LEAVE IT ALONE. JOSHUA 

How does he know me so well? I do as the note says. I go back to work for a while, finally finishing up the important stuff about 5:45. No sign of Josh yet. I wander over to Margaret's desk. 

"Are they still in there?" 

"Yeah, judging by the smell wafting into Leo's office they are smoking cigars." 

"Gross, but I guess that's a good sign. If the President was still furious at Josh he wouldn't share his stash of cigars, would he?" 

"Probably not" 

I hear the door between Leo's office and the Oval Office open and Leo comes over by Margaret's desk. He doesn't notice me at first. 

"Margaret, where is the file on...Oh, Donna, I didn't see you. Josh is still in with the President, come in for a minute" 

We go into his office and he shuts the door. 

"I just want to let you know that things went well. I don't know what you did for him this weekend but thank you." 

"I really didn't do that much. We just hung out. We didn't even talk that much" 

"Well, what ever you did it helped. The President noticed too." 

"I know, he sent me a note this morning." 

"Donna, I know he doesn't always show it but he does need you" 

"I know" 

The President yells for Leo from the Oval Office. I guess Josh is on his way back to work. Leo stands to go see the President. He stops in front of me and leans over to say something. 

"I don't care what Josh says, you're a good girl" he says with a smile. Then he totally shocks me by planting a kiss on my forehead. Only Leo could call me a "good girl" and have it melt my heart. 

I head back to my desk. Josh is in his office with his feet on the desk, eating another one of the cookies. I plop down in the chair opposite him. 

"So, how'd it go?" 

"Actually it went OK. Leo and the President agree with the deal you made with Danny. I think I better lock you away somewhere, the President has a thing for you. Mrs. Landingham better watch her step or he may try to replace her with you" Josh says with that old familiar twinkle in his eye. I'm sure I am blushing. 

"I see my package came. Guess you saw my note" 

"I did and can I say that it really annoys me that you know me so well" 

"I know it does, but I could say the same about how well you know me." 

"True, so what's in the package?" 

"You'll see soon enough" 

Oh goody, something for me. 

"Get your coat. We're going for a walk" 

"Josh it's 20 degrees out" 

"I know but I don't care" 

"OK, good thing I didn't wear a short skirt today" 

I grab my coat and he opens the envelope, inside is a long thin box in Christmas paper. He shoves it in his coat pocket and grabs my hand. Good thing I didn't wear heels either because Josh is practically running through the bullpen. Once we get to the nearing empty hallway he does slow down a little. He leads me out the door into the Rose Garden. 

"We're here" 

"Where, the Rose Garden, it's the dead of winter, there are no roses. Josh, I'm freezing." 

"Donnatella, shut up, please and sit down." 

We sit on a marble bench which must have a temperature around -10 but I stop complaining. Josh takes my hand. He seems to be fumbling around for the right words. Finally he speaks. 

"Donna, I know I've been a pain in the ass for a while now, especially the last few weeks. I know you tried to help and I just pushed you away. I didn't mean to. It's just that I wasn't ready to talk. It's not because I didn't want to talk to you." 

"I know." 

"I've said some things to you recently that I'm not very proud of, especially the self worth comment. I know that really did hurt you but you were too nice to smack me for it." 

"Believe me, I wanted to" 

"I'm sure you did. I'm really just trying to apologize for all I put you through. You didn't deserve any of it. I'm sorry. What I said about you being a life saver was true. Even though I didn't let you help me in the way you wanted to you did help me, in ways you will never understand." 

I think I'm going to cry, although the tears will probably freeze on my face. 

"And about "us", I like the way things are. The way there are no strings attached, I'm not ready for any strings. If you are I'm really sorry. I don't want to ruin what it is we already have either. Can't we just stay like this?" 

"Staying like this is fine with me Josh. If something happens somewhere down the line, great, if not then I still have my best friend. That's more important to me than anything. That life saver thing, it goes both ways. I do need you too" 

Now Josh is getting teary. He wipes at his eyes with his gloved hand and reaches into his pocket for the box. 

"I didn't know what to get you for Christmas until this morning. By the time I got to the office I knew exactly what I wanted but I had trouble finding it. That's why I spent most of the morning on the phone, making my own calls. Here, I hope you like it" 

I take the box and pull off one glove with my teeth. I unwrap it and take off the cover. Inside is a beautiful gold bracelet. Near the clasp is a tiny gold charm, a life preserver, a life saver. For a few minutes all I can do is cry. 

"Joshua, I love it" 

He takes off his gloves and puts it on me. It's perfect. 

"Donna, there's something else" 

"What? another package" 

"Not exactly. I think I'm ready to tell you what happened these past few weeks. The meeting with Stanley was a real eye opener and I want you to be the first one I share things with. Are you ready to hear everything?" 

"More than ready, but can we do it inside?" 

"No problem" 

He holds out his hand and I take it in mine. Maybe things will progress and maybe they won't. But one thing is for sure, Josh is going to get better and I'll be right there to help. 

THE END


End file.
